Recalibrating Your Habits

In a recent podcast, I recounted the story of participating in a February virtual workshop where I had quite a realization.  I had my notebook on my lap and without much conscious thought, I wrote this phrase:  My current habits are not aligning with who I want to become.

That surprised me because I’ve been quite diligent designing my habits with the intended outcome in mind, especially since the pandemic began.  But I’m beginning to see that what sustained me throughout these last two years will not support me going forward.

Life has begun to shift once again and even though it’s toward the positive, it’s still change.  Our work life, home life, day-to-day routine, how we socialize and travel are all in various states of transformation.  As are we. So it makes sense to move from habits that helped us cope and sustain our daily existence to ones that will help us grow and thrive today and in the future.  

Many formed good habits during the pandemic as a result of slowing down and taking stock, including:

• Practicing holistic self-care that encompasses body, mind and spirit;

• Preparing food at home;

• Prioritizing time with family and friends;

• Getting outdoors;

• Spending time creating;

• Being generous with time and resources;

• Clearing out the old; and

• Using technology for connection, like video calls with loved ones.

With this in mind, I created a little exercise for myself that you might want to try. On a blank sheet of paper, draw a line down the center of the page.  At the top, write these headings: “What Supports My Life Direction” over the left-hand column and “What Detracts From My Life Direction” over the right hand column.

When I did this exercise, I had a clear idea of what my life direction looked like.  If you do not, take time to get some clarity, perhaps writing a sentence or two at the top of your page.

Begin to brainstorm and list the habits, activities and experiences that move you toward the life you’re envisioning for yourself or move you away from it.  The supportive habits should be focused on things you can do for yourself, by yourself and to nurture yourself, whether you’re able to do them at the moment or not.  The list of what detracts you from doing those things will be broader and include current personal and professional expectations and obligations, both yours and others.

The whole brainstorming exercise should take no more than five minutes.  Focus on the obvious to start. You can always go back and add more items whenever you’d like.

Here’s my brainstorming list in no particular order.  First, what supports me:  Writing, CrossFit, running, daily walks, my closest relationships, preparing and enjoying healthy food, a clean and orderly home, nature, music, story, books, podcasts, spiritual connection, road tripping, solitude, deep conversation, deep connection, learning something new, disconnecting from tech, simplicity.

And here’s what detracts:  A packed schedule of obligations and commitments, overdoing anything (eating, drinking, working), small talk, crowds, ongoing media feeds of any kind, tech notifications, non-stop news updates, traveling (aside from road tripping).

As I reviewed my lists, I was relieved that I was doing many of the things on the left side of the sheet.  My focus is on what detracts, because those are the easiest habits to form and sometimes, they even form by default.  For example, I can easily fall into a constant stream of podcasts, audiobooks, news or music.  It leaves me mentally spent by the end of the day.  So I’m mindful now to limit background noise.

I have similar simple strategies to address the other items in the detracts column.  And I will continue to review and refine the list as the year unfolds.

Perhaps this is a good time for you to be mindful of what habits will support you going forward.  How do you want to continue to spend your time or do you need to make a change?  What should you keep, what should you let go?  Do you need more structure or more flexibility?  More social time or quiet time?  Is it a life season where you’re focusing on others or can you carve out time for an activity that’s just for you?

Mix and match and create a hybrid of habits that feel right for you today that will also support your future growth.  You may be surprised that the things that used to release stress or support and energize you no longer do.  What a difference it can make when you mindfully repurpose that time on new habits that support you and new activities that light you up.

Journal Reflections:  How is life changing for you at this time?  Are there habits you’d like to change or implement?  How will these habits and activities support your life direction?