Preparing for Your Next Life Chapter – Advice I Wish I Had

I came barreling into my 50s.  I embraced it.  I felt like I was experiencing adolescence all over again – minus the awkward growth spurts.  It was as if I wrote myself a permission slip to let life rip.  And I rode that enthusiastic wave of possibilities until I turned 59 last year.

You see, it’s not unusual for me begin planning for the new year as I enter the last quarter of current year.  But when I flipped through the calendar last year, I saw it.  The number 60.  There was no escaping it.  It’s a very round number – and it was attached to my birthday! 

My grandmother turned 60 the year I was born.  She was born in 1904 and had all the sensibilities and traditions of someone who witnessed the history of the 20th century.  My parents both retired in their 60s, the old fashioned way.  The rest of their days were anchored in their home routines and some travel a few times a year.

Yet as I stared at my upcoming birthday on the calendar, those memories just confused me.  It wasn’t what I wanted or how I felt.  So I started the year with a feeling that was foreign to me – dread.  I was getting old.  And there was nothing I could do about it except count down the months to my next milestone.

Here’s the good news.  As I write this, I’m about five months into my new decade, and I feel like I have a new lease on life.  What changed?  A lot of reflection and a shift in perspective.

I also realized that my insights would have been helpful when I entered my second career chapter, leaving my corporate career for the entrepreneurial path.  Whatever life transition you’re facing, here are the five things I wish someone shared with me as prepared for my next life chapter:

1. What you thought mattered doesn’t.  You will experience a shift from activities that generated lots of external validation to ones that cultivate inner fulfillment.  This doesn’t mean that the decades of achievement and pursuing your version of the dream are meaningless.  In fact, it’s because of this pursuit that you not only find yourself where you are today, but can appreciate the inner journey that’s about take precedence.  This is about doing it your way.

2. Letting go frees up energy for what’s ahead.  Releasing who you no longer are or wish to be is not only liberating, it allows you to focus on what matters most to you at this stage of life.  This includes material things, such as unnecessary possessions, and the nonmaterial, such as relationships that no longer serve, striving for perfection, or ruminating on negative thoughts.  When you cling to things that are no longer useful in your life, you are choosing to give them your time, money and focus.  When you let them go, you have more energy at your disposal.

3. You have what you need for the journey.  Given your life experience, you now have tangible proof that you have the innate capacity to meet the moment and overcome any challenges on your path. You’ve learned from your setbacks, know who and what will support you, and have the wisdom to make informed decisions.  There is no one who knows your way forward better than you.  This inner confidence is all you need to move forward with grace and ease.

4. Trust the unfolding.  It will be in your best interest to open to life’s mysteries.  In the past, you needed to see the entire plan before you took one step, which worked well in a controlled environment like a corporation.  But the heart-based life you’re creating is about believing that the Universe has a plan and the people, places and things will be there when needed.  Trust the greater purpose of existence, especially when it’s not evident, and be prepared to be amazed.

5. The decades keep getting better.  Remember that rebellious energy you felt when you turned 50? Well, your 60s are akin to the adolescent becoming the young adult, but with perspective and resources you lacked in your 20s.  Your 60s are the youngest decade of elderhood.  You have newfound independence, your health and well-being, along with the freedom to explore your passions.  Take time to appreciate life’s beauty and simple pleasures.  Embrace and enjoy it all.

So with that as a backdrop, how can you begin working with these themes to prepare yourself for next life milestone?

Here are three of the most impactful things I did – and still do – to keep me heart-centered as I enjoy this phase of life:

1. Connect with your heart each day so you can hear your inner guidance.  When I coach a client, the first thing I do is create a safe, supportive space that invites quiet and calm.  This is important because my job is not to provide the answers, it’s to encourage the client to find solutions from within.  And the way to access that inner wisdom is through mindful self-reflection to make decisions that are aligned with your truest self.

   You can do this in any manner that works for you.  When I was working in corporate, my favorite ways to connect with myself was through long trail runs, driving in my car, and in brief meditation sessions, especially on airplanes.  Today, I start my day with ten mindful minutes, outdoors if possible, and I like to take long walks in nature.  You might choose to journal, create art, move your body, meditate, or spend time outdoors.  Choose something you enjoy doing.  Anything that puts you in a contemplative state of mind will work.

   There are numerous benefits in connecting with your heart each day.  It will help you mindfully create your next life chapter.  In addition, people who are aligned with their deepest heart desires experience high levels of well-being and purpose, along with stronger relationships.

2. Declutter and simplify your life.  This one is an interesting one, because it packs more of an emotional punch than you may imagine.  And those underlying emotions are why we tend to put this off.  This is because many of our possessions are linked to memories, milestones, and loved ones.  Releasing certain items can feel like confronting a buried part of ourselves or losing connection to our past.

   It’s been my experience that it’s easier to handle this project in layers.  Approach it with compassion, in a way that best fits your personality.  This isn’t about shedding everything you own.  It’s about being intentional and measured with what you release and what you choose to bring into your life going forward.  A way to work through it all is to acknowledge the emotions.  Then gently begin to donate, sell or give away the things that no longer support you.  Start with the easy stuff and, in time, work your way through the more sentimental items, if that feels right.

   The benefits of creating a streamlined life include more focus, enhanced well-being, and mindful legacy planning, ensuring your plans for gifting the things that matter most are communicated.  As your possession footprint begins to shrink, it’s not unusual to feel lighter and more empowered in relation to your resources.

3. Embrace uncertainty.  This can be a superpower, especially for midlifers.  As you age, you can crave predictability and cling to the familiar.  But that can limit your growth.  There is power in surrendering to the flow of life, like floating along a river current rather than trying to swim upstream.  It can be transformative when you let go of the control you think you have over your circumstances and trust in the Universal plan.

   Two of the best ways to embrace uncertainty are to challenge your fears and consistently take small steps outside of your comfort zone.  This builds resilience, a wonderful quality to have in our later years.

   The main benefit of relaxing into the flow is a new perspective on your life, including a deeper appreciation of its beauty, greater fulfillment, and a sense of adventure.

The practices of connecting with your heart, decluttering your life, and embracing uncertainty will support you as you prepare for your next life milestone.  I hope you embrace the unique journey that is yours alone and trust in the unfolding of life.  You have the power to create a life filled with joy, purpose, and vibrancy.  Your best years are ahead!

Journal Reflections: Which of the five things resonated most and why? Which practice felt most useful at this time? How can you incorporate it into your day?