Reimagining Midlife Wellness, Part VI - Growth Mindset
This is the sixth installment of a multi-part series on Reimagining Midlife Wellness, focusing on the importance of strengthening our vitality as we get older, especially in times of transition. These articles will provide a framework to help you define what matters most to you at this stage of your life and ways to continue to take positive action to be well.
In Part VI of the series, we’ll be exploring the fourth Athena Principle, which is growth mindset. I love this Principle, because how you view your wellness journey not only determines your level of progress, but your level of enjoyment. I’ve found that the older I get, the more satisfaction and pleasure I want to experience as part of my wellness routines.
This is a shift for many of us who are used to pushing our limits to the brink in the name of wellness. When you adopt a growth mindset, you begin to focus on what is right in your life. The more you practice this mindset, the more you’ll being to experience challenges as opportunities that will, in turn, position you to move forward with more confidence and ease.
I vividly remember my first CrossFit class a few years back. During my first session, I was surprised by the degree of intensity of some of the moves, like wall walks, burpees and barbell lifts. The pace felt relentless and when I finally got home, I turned on the coffee pot and collapsed on the couch for 15 minutes before dragging myself to the shower to get ready for work.
When the alarm went off the next morning and I reached toward my night table to shut it off, I was jolted by the level of soreness I felt. “Uh-oh,” I groaned as I laid there and did a body scan realizing that every single muscle in my body ached. I could barely get out of bed. For the next five days, each time I got out of my car or up from my desk, my quads would freeze for a minute. I would wince and breathe deeply before taking a step.
But when the following Monday came, I was back at the CrossFit box, nervously awaiting the first round of instructions. Based on my first experience, I knew I’d find a way to make it through the workout, although at the end of 60 minutes my energy was fully depleted.
Over the next few weeks, I felt a little more energy toward the end of the workout and a little less sore afterward. Some days the improvement was barely noticeable, but, in hindsight, the workouts did get easier over time. Even so, these workouts were something I endured rather than enjoyed.
Something significantly shifted after a year of training. I began to appreciate certain aspects of the workouts, such as my ability to handle the unpredictability of the routines and how I could feel the blood pumping through my body as worked out. I began to equate the once uncomfortable burn I felt in my muscles with being alive and strong rather than fatigued. I began to appreciate my body for what it could do, which was a lot for a 50+-year-old woman. I also reconnected with my “Why,” including a sense of community with my fellow CrossFitters.
Working out no longer felt like something I had to do – it became something I got to do.
This is how a growth mindset works. By choosing to focus your energy and resources on the positive instead of the negative, you take ownership of your emotions and experiences. And it’s an ongoing process.
As I’ve mentioned earlier in this series of articles, I was a co-provider of care for a family member. When those responsibilities suddenly increased a few months ago, I needed to make another adjustment to my workout approach – putting my CrossFit membership on hold and working out at home. I’ll write more about that when we wrap up this series and I share how I’ve reimagined my own midlife wellness.
Let’s continue by going a bit deeper into growth mindset. There are two components in the dictionary definition of mindset:
A fixed mental attitude or disposition that predetermines a person’s responses to and interpretations of situations.
An inclination or habit.
Let’s begin with the first component of mindset. A positive attitude is a state of mind that has the capacity to envision and routinely expect favorable outcomes, which influences behavior. A person with a positive attitude:
Builds on a foundation of optimism and positive thinking;
Views situations positively (I can, we will, it’s possible) and does not contribute to fear-based thinking or actions;
Perceives obstacles as opportunistic challenges;
Acknowledges, but does not dwell on, problems and sees the silver lining in the unexpected;
Tries new things;
Appreciates the goodness in all people and believes in a greater good for all; and
Accepts the world as it is and works to make it better.
Sometimes just a small shift in attitude can get you going in the right direction, such as:
Shifting from a feeling of drudgery (I have to) to being open to trying something new (I get to);
Easing up on the need for perfection and doing the best you can at any given point in time; and
Reframing setbacks by finding inspiration in similar stories, addressing what didn’t go as planned, and expressing gratitude for what went well.
And now the second component of mindset. Your habits are behaviors that create who you are and determine where you’re going. Habits are something you do repeatedly, sometimes without thought. I like to think of habit as a groove – a way to make good choices routine and easy by the support system created around it.
People who establish and practice good habits tend to be:
Self-motivated and action-oriented, rising early and minimizing time spent that is not in alignment with what matters most;
Disciplined and health conscious, eating well, exercising regularly and prioritizing sleep;
People-oriented who enjoy healthy relationship with family, friends, colleagues and those in their community;
Emotionally mature with well-defined boundaries, yet generous with time and resources; and
Growth-oriented, investing in practices that support their continuous improvement and ongoing learning.
Of course, some habits can also work against us. We all have unfavorable habits that have become actions we perform on “autopilot.” These are done without much thought or consideration as to how they are affecting us long term. These are the habits sabotaging what we really want out of life and it’s helpful to know what those are so you can counter them.
And now your takeaway. What habits have you formed that are in direct conflict with your wellness aspirations? How can you find ways to make your wellness aspirations a priority? What makes good habits stick?
You can answer these questions by adopting a pattern that behavioral psychologists use to encourage forming good habits by using routines, cues and incentives:
Routine: Finding ways to make actions so commonplace and memorable they are easily followed regularly;
Cues: Visual reminders that promote a positive state of mind in relation to the habit; and
Incentive: Reinforcing the intended behavior with a meaningful reward.
The secret of forming good habits starts with the awareness that seemingly small or inconsequential decisions you make add up over time. The trajectory of good habits will propel you forward if your decision-making is in alignment with where you want to go.
When I think of mindset, I’m reminded of a story attributed to the Cherokee lineage.
An elder is walking with a young boy and talking about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” the elder says. “It’s a terrible fight and it’s between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.”
“The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. The same fight is going on inside you and inside every other person, too.”
The young boy gave it some thought and then asked, “Which wolf will win?”
The elder replied, “The one you feed.”
Attitude and habits are intertwined and play a huge part in who you are and who you will become. Shifts from a fixed mindset of “I should” to a growth mindset of “I will” puts the power back into your hands and serves as an accelerator for optimized well-being.
Journal Reflections: How can utilizing a growth mindset help you reimagine your midlife wellness? What practices can help you increase your positive attitude? What habits can support and increase your well-being?
Notes:
You can download The Athena Principles overview @ athenawellness.com/actionplan to help you chart your unique path.
If you prefer, you can listen to this article here: Episode 219