Retirement is a Verb

Have you ever had one of those days when seemingly disparate thought streams keep swirling around in your head?

Like you, I’ve been trying to make sense of national and world affairs, feeling the unending waves of change and tragedy.  It can take a mighty dose of courage some days just to keep an open heart, stay compassionate and empathetic, and not allow the sheer volume and breadth of current events to anaesthetize.

Also occupying my mind these days is the unfolding of a new horizon of my work, which is focused on helping professionals who are contemplating leaving corporate life and those who have recently retired find meaning and purpose in this current stage of life.

To distract myself from all of this mental busyness, I listened to a favorite podcast while running errands early one morning.  A guest was recounting a story of a decision a man made more than five decades prior to volunteer one hour of his time each week for a cause that deeply affected him.  Through that one hour of pro bono legal work, the guest’s father was able to provide an upbringing for his children that he would not have been able to if it weren’t for that lawyer’s donated time.  And one of those children, the man who was telling the story, dedicated his life to public service and currently serves as a U.S. senator.

That’s when all of my mental chatter converged and I realized that retirement is a verb.

While researching retirement trends, I found quite a few references to “retirement regret,” leading to a wave of 55-64 year-olds returning to the workforce because they missed the work, daily structure and social interaction.  Without it, many found themselves bored, unfulfilled and inactive as the world around them continued to move forward.  Quite frequently, this disengagement led to a negative impact on mental and physical health.

Many people plan for their financial future, but few plan for their future life.  Perhaps the question to explore during the planning phase is:  How do I find happiness and meaning outside of my career?

It may be helpful to start with some basic definitions.  What is happiness?  What is meaning?

Happiness is defined as “an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment and fulfillment.”  It’s an internal experience, a general feeling of satisfaction in areas of life that are important to us.

Meaning is defined as “the importance we ascribe to something.”  It’s about emotional significance, the “why” behind our actions.  Meaning is outward focused and created and shared with others. 

Happiness and meaning are not found on bucket lists.  Rather, they are the result of living a purposeful, healthy lifestyle.  They are rooted in action.

I think this is where many get stuck.  There are so many options.  What actions can we take to move closer to happiness and meaning?  A new kind of work?  A new challenge?  Something new to learn?  Being of service?

This made me think of a concept in a gem of a book written more than 30 years ago by Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.  In that book, Covey introduced a simple model comprised of two circles:  The Circle of Concern and The Circle of Influence.

The Circle of Concern includes all the things that cause worry in our lives, such as the economy, weather, societal trends, workplace culture, government decisions, social media, news, and the actions, opinions and expectations of others – anything that causes anxiety and energy drain but are outside of our control.

The Circle of Influence includes only the things where we have the ability to take action.  This includes our personal choices, routines, boundaries, self-talk, self-care, self-compassion, news and social media exposure, and the support we seek and offer.

When we focus on The Circle of Concern, it can feel futile and result in reactivity and negativity.  Conversely, spending our energy in The Circle of Influence feels empowering, proactive and positive.

Here’s the key – the more we focus on what we can influence, the more change we can elicit.  As a result, our Circle of Influence increases along with our positive energy and impact.

How does all of this impact those who are thinking of leaving long-time corporate careers or who have recently left?

The lawyer I mentioned earlier in this post was moved to donate his legal services because the television program he was watching in 1965 was interrupted to show news footage of the civil rights march in Selma, Alabama that ended in violence.  The next day, the lawyer connected with a start-up organization called the Fair Housing Council whose mission is to ensure equal opportunity to rent or purchase property.  Those seemingly small efforts changed lives, including the recipient, Senator Cory Booker, who, because of the safety, schooling and support he received throughout his youth, attended Stanford University on scholarship, became a Rhodes Scholar and a graduate of Yale Law School. 

That’s the power we have as we embark on a new phase of life.  How will you choose to repurpose the time you once devoted to your career?  Will you use this opportunity to shape a new identity based on camaraderie and a common goal to move the world forward?  How can you best leverage a lifetime of experience and talent you honed for decades?

Just one hour a week can change the trajectory of someone’s life.  In doing so, your Circle of Influence will expand and your well-being will pulse with positivity, optimism and radiance.

#BestYearsAhead!

Journal Reflections:  Are you focusing your time and energy in The Circle of Concern or Influence?  What steps can you take to expand your Circle of Influence?  How might those actions impact your community?